Boycotters: The Anti-Defamation League’s ‘Anti-Semitism Workshop’ Wasn’t What I Expected

This week far-left groups across the United States called for a boycott against the Anti-Defamation League (ADL) because they were shocked to find out that when the ADL suggested students go to anti-Semitism workshops after screaming at Israeli speakers, the workshops are actually about how to not be anti-Semitic. “I’m a bit overwhelmed with emotions The post Boycotters: The Anti-Defamation League’s ‘Anti-Semitism Workshop’ Wasn’t What I Expected appeared first on The Mideast Beast.

Boycotters: The Anti-Defamation League’s ‘Anti-Semitism Workshop’ Wasn’t What I Expected

This week far-left groups across the United States called for a boycott against the Anti-Defamation League (ADL) because they were shocked to find out that when the ADL suggested students go to anti-Semitism workshops after screaming at Israeli speakers, the workshops are actually about how to not be anti-Semitic.

“I’m a bit overwhelmed with emotions at the moment and I can’t find a regulated safe space anywhere,” said 22-year-old empathizer of the cause, Matthew Macaroni. “I feel betrayed, dismayed, and triggered all at once. An ‘anti-Semitism workshop’ should mean that the ADL teaches you how to better berate Israeli speakers. Like, maybe my delivery of ‘you’re committing genocide’ was a bit off, or maybe I forgot to add ‘Islamophobes’ before storming out. But it turns out they told me I had to apologize for everything that I said! It’s not fair, I worked so hard to yell incoherently about the Nakba and then run away! That’s Arabic for ‘catastrophe’ for all the losers who don’t know about the worst crime in all of human history!”

Other organizers agreed with Macaroni, stating. “I don’t hate Jews at all. My 23andMe results came back 100 percent Irish but I was stingy about paying extra so I’m basically a Jew. That said, I think the ADL really lies about their mission. Like, when students report an anti-Semitic incident on campus, the perpetrator doesn’t immediately get promoted in the SJP. That’s super unfair, they’re doing the best they can.”

Other organizers are emphasizing that they’re embracing the boycott because the ADL assists Jewish students in denouncing hate on campuses, and any good anti-hate specialist knows there’s only room for one protected group at a time. However, they promise they’d end the boycott if the ADL is true to its word and offers all encompassing, real, anti-Semitism workshops.

The post Boycotters: The Anti-Defamation League’s ‘Anti-Semitism Workshop’ Wasn’t What I Expected appeared first on The Mideast Beast.

Source : The Mideast Beast More   

What's Your Reaction?

like
0
dislike
0
love
0
funny
0
angry
0
sad
0
wow
0

Next Article

Upgrade Your Pitiful Lifetime Alumni Membership to Super Double Diamond Lifetime Deluxe!

Dear Valued Lifetime Alumni Association Member, We just want to take a moment and thank you again for your monetary support by way of your Lifetime Alumni Membership. We would never take for granted that monetary gift, which is why we’ve sent you daily mailers, called your cell number every hour for a month, and […] The post Upgrade Your Pitiful Lifetime Alumni Membership to Super Double Diamond Lifetime Deluxe! appeared first on Robot Butt.

Upgrade Your Pitiful Lifetime Alumni Membership to Super Double Diamond Lifetime Deluxe!

Dear Valued Lifetime Alumni Association Member,

We just want to take a moment and thank you again for your monetary support by way of your Lifetime Alumni Membership. We would never take for granted that monetary gift, which is why we’ve sent you daily mailers, called your cell number every hour for a month, and spammed your parents’ home phone incessantly to let you know about this new exclusive invitation. For a mere $600, you can upgrade your pitiful Lifetime Alumni Membership to a Super Double Diamond Lifetime Deluxe Membership.

That’s right, while new members would have to pay a whopping $1,300 fee to go Double Diamond, your previously purchased $800 lifetime membership qualifies you for a mere $600 upgrade. Wow, that’s a screaming deal! However, you’ll need to act fast. The chance to upgrade to Super Double Diamond Deluxe is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity that is available to you at any time.

So what does a Super Double Diamond Lifetime Deluxe Membership get you? A brand new poly-laminate alumni card free of nearly any typos. Plus, your very own plastic Captain Crunch whistle that we found next to the highway. You can rest assured that these will be shipped to you in discrete packaging that will not lead anyone to assume you’re ordering sex toys in bulk.

But will a Super Double Diamond Lifetime Deluxe Membership really change your life forever? Yes.

The Alumni Association needs your support now more than ever. With an ever-increasing number of alumni, we constantly need to sell alumni memberships in order to continue selling alumni memberships. And don’t forget, a Super Double Diamond Lifetime Deluxe upgrade is tax-deductible (it may not be tax-deductible) and goes toward helping students (it may not help students).

There are several easy ways for you to gives us your money. Send us cash, check, or spare credit cards to “Alumni House” 1515 College Way. Visit our web portal at alumni.college.edu/WeLoveMoney. Click anywhere on this page to begin a PayPal transaction. Call the Alumni House at 1-800-Dollars and give us the account and routing number of your primary checking account. Go outside and give a slow nod to one of our representatives waiting outside your home or whisper at any time, “I would like to upgrade to a Super Double Diamond Lifetime Deluxe Membership.”

Please keep in mind that the school is currently considering a new subscription-based model for all alumni. If we do decide to move forward in this direction, all current programs will be suspended. You will be welcome to keep your alumni card and/or diploma, but they have reached their product end-of-life and will no longer be supported by the administration.

We look forward to welcoming you as a Super Double Diamond Lifetime Deluxe Member and hearing the triumphant call of your new plastic whistle.

Sincerely,

Donald “Paying Tuition Wasn’t Enough” Lipton

Senior Director,

RevenueCollege Alumni Association

The post Upgrade Your Pitiful Lifetime Alumni Membership to Super Double Diamond Lifetime Deluxe! appeared first on Robot Butt.

Source : Robot Butt More   

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse the site you are agreeing to our use of cookies.