Crystal Lake Summer Camp Inexplicably More Popular During October

As the leaves begin to change and Halloween approaches, one upstate New York summer camp is just now preparing to open for its summer season.  Camp Crystal Lake, known for its illustrious woodline and remarkably consistent murderous rampages, defies all logic once again by waiting until this week to bring in the counselors who will […] The post Crystal Lake Summer Camp Inexplicably More Popular During October appeared first on Robot Butt.

Crystal Lake Summer Camp Inexplicably More Popular During October

As the leaves begin to change and Halloween approaches, one upstate New York summer camp is just now preparing to open for its summer season. 

Camp Crystal Lake, known for its illustrious woodline and remarkably consistent murderous rampages, defies all logic once again by waiting until this week to bring in the counselors who will watch over the campers expected to arrive later in the month. 

While it seems eccentric or even nonsensical, it isn’t that out of the ordinary for the long-running and long-closing summer camp. In fact, the camp has found that it consistently draws the biggest crowd during this time of year. When asked why the camp is popular at such an unusual time of the year, current counselor Greg “The Zipline King” Reynolds said, “I’m not sure. It might have something to do with the masked killer that stalks the camp around this time every year. The campers and counselors both seem to love sitting around the campfire and telling the story of that guy. Anyways, do you want to hear about the zipline I’m setting up this year? It’s going to be radical!”

We didn’t, so instead, we talked to a local resident who wanted to remain anonymous. They told us they consistently hang out at the decrepit gas station between town and the camp and warn the counselors that they shouldn’t go, but that year after year their warnings go unheeded. They went on to say that this has been going on for ten years, eleven if you count the camp’s reopening, and twelve if you count the year that it was made into a space camp. 

A little digging reveals that in the camp’s many openings, nearly every counselor that has worked there has been killed, with the exception of a few sole survivors (later edits to the news stories report that even some of those survivors didn’t actually make it, either). Here’s hoping this is the year that turns it all around, and the campers and team at Camp Crystal Lake have a fun summer in the sun in the middle of October.

If not, there’s always next year. 

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