Detective Arrests Wrong Man Despite Lengthy Preamble

MILWAUKEE – An arrest has finally been made for the murder of rich socialite and candy mogul Edgar Stanley Franklin III. Unfortunately, further investigation has nearly immediately found that the lead detective on the case wrongfully arrested an innocent man. The murder took place in the middle of the night last Thursday at Franklin’s mansion. […] The post Detective Arrests Wrong Man Despite Lengthy Preamble appeared first on Robot Butt.

Detective Arrests Wrong Man Despite Lengthy Preamble

MILWAUKEE – An arrest has finally been made for the murder of rich socialite and candy mogul Edgar Stanley Franklin III. Unfortunately, further investigation has nearly immediately found that the lead detective on the case wrongfully arrested an innocent man.

The murder took place in the middle of the night last Thursday at Franklin’s mansion. Franklin was the victim of multiple stab wounds to increasingly surprising places. The suspect list included many of his closest relatives, who were all staying in the mansion the night of the murder.

With all the potential murderers under one roof, ace detective and former chess world champion James Thorn was put on the case. His lengthy run of one-on-one interviews found that every single suspect, including Franklin’s grandchildren, had probable cause for the murder, but also an airtight alibi, making the case likely unsolvable. Despite that, Thorn gathered everyone in the mansion’s foyer claiming to have cracked the case.

He then proceeded to go on what has been described by witnesses as a “nearly incomprehensible ramble that felt like it was never going to end,” where he paced about, pointing at nearly every suspect, object, and piece of furniture in the room, nodding and making exclamations of discovery to himself like, “yes, of course!” 

After the tirade, Thorn reportedly pointed at Jeremiah Franklin, the youngest son of Franklin III, and announced him the killer. The room gasped and watched with confused awe as Jeremiah was taken away by local law enforcement. 

Merely days after the arrest, Jeremiah’s lawyers have managed to poke nearly a dozen holes in Thorn’s case, with the most sustainable being that “simply running from a lamp to a fireplace and shouting ‘that’s it’ does not provide any kind of evidence.”

Other notable information that has come out since the arrest is that Edgar Franklin III, the deceased’s first born, has fled to an unknown location with no warning or reason. 

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