Man Who Remembers Bowl Of Prawns From 1988 Doesn’t Know Who Put Up To $1 Mil In His Bank Account

"I'm not across all of the detail, sorry"

Man Who Remembers Bowl Of Prawns From 1988 Doesn’t Know Who Put Up To $1 Mil In His Bank Account

A former Attorney General who remembers the specific type of food that was provided at a debating function 33 years ago, can’t for the life of him think who might have deposited up to $1 million in a trust fund he set up.

“I just don’t have that sort of attention to detail, sorry,” said the man who also remembered the precise act of ironing a shirt on a university trip more than three decades ago.

He said the busyness of life meant it was impossible to keep track of every single little detail. “I’m across the big things, sure, like those yummy prawns from ‘88; they stick in my mind. About 10-12 cm long, with a beautiful zesty sauce. But for God’s sake, I can’t be expected to keep up with pesky little details like who’s funding a seven-figure law bill for a case I initiated!”

He said the funding could’ve come from anywhere. “On any given day there are literally thousands of people who could potentially deposit a large sum of money into an account. Who keeps a track of that sort of thing?

“If the money was deposited into a bowl that contained prawns or some other type of hors d’oeuvres, then absolutely I would’ve taken note of where it came from. But not if it goes into a financial account of with my name on it”.

Source : The Shovel More   

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AOC Ripped for Attending Met Gala in Tan Suit

NEW YORK, NY – Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is facing heat for showing up to the exclusive Met Gala wearing former President Obama’s tan suit. “I thought it would be kind of a […] The post AOC Ripped for Attending Met Gala in Tan Suit appeared first on BeetPress Satire.

AOC Ripped for Attending Met Gala in Tan Suit

NEW YORK, NY – Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is facing heat for showing up to the exclusive Met Gala wearing former President Obama’s tan suit.

“I thought it would be kind of a bold statement, challenging the patriarchy and playing with gender norms,” explained Ocasio-Cortez at the event. “Plus, I found the suit for like $12 at Goodwill, so I thought it would reinforce the image that I’m a champion for the poor.”

Progressives pointed out that the outfit paid homage to their number one enemy Barack Obama. Conservatives were quick to point out that the suit looked too casual, and unfit for such a formal event, with former representative Peter King saying “There’s no way, I don’t think, any of us can excuse what AOC did yesterday. A member of Congress should distinguish themselves by wearing something classy, like what Whoopi had on.”

Queer Eye for the Straight Guy fashion connoisseur Tan France was equally critical, calling the outfit choice a major faux pas and commenting “Oh look, it’s the audacity of taupe” via Twitter.

The Met Gala is an annual fundraising event for the benefit of the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s Costume Institute in New York. It marks the opening of the Costume Institute’s annual fashion exhibit. This year’s theme was The Lexicon of Fashion. While a seat at the table can cost upward for $35,000, celebrities and politicians like Ocasio-Cortez typically attend for free.

Ocasio-Cortez previously evoked criticism from progressives for quitting her bartending job and earning a salary from her work in the House of Representatives.

“In retrospect, I should have followed Representative Carolyn Maloney‘s lead and used the gala as an opportunity to make a bold political statement better in keeping with my goals and objectives in Congress, like, wearing a white dress emblazoned with Tax the Rich in big red letters on the back or something,” said Ocasio-Cortez, adding “that would have made progressives happy.”

The post AOC Ripped for Attending Met Gala in Tan Suit appeared first on BeetPress Satire.

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